Advice needed

[Dazza1]

6 years ago me and my sister had a big bust up and both said things to each other that we shouldn't of. We stopped talkin and seeing each other but then my other family members IE 4 sisters,brother, uncle and my nan also stopped talkin to me.

Last year I went to my uncles 60th 2 of my sisters and the uncle who stopped talkin to me was there. I thought u know what it's silly now it's been 6 years and we both have kids so I tried to talk to them the basically turned around and ignored me.

Last night I went to my dads and the 2 sisters were there again as I've walked in I heard my dads girlfriend say to her friend this is petes son (my dad names) and these are his sisters that he choices to ignore. I let the comment go and didn't say a word and I also got on and had a good time and even made drinks for my sisters kid who don't talk to me and help him on the bouncy castle.

My dad always goes to my sisters and in the 8 years I've lived at my place has never been to mine. I've invited him to BBQ's Sunday dinner and my kids party but he never comes. So I wanna know do u think I should have it out with him or will it just start more crap? I would do anythin for them and they know that aswel whenever they have rang me todo or help I've always bent over backwards to do it. I've even tried loads of times to sort things with my sis who I was very close with.

 

[Caz-133cup]

Oh daz it must be heartbreaking for you. Family are so important and its horrible when you want to sort it and they are just acting like children.

My friend is in a similar boat. She is the youngest and has two sisters and a brother.
One sister falls out with all of them over silly stuff, I know her and she is a nasty woman always trying to hurt people. When their dad died over 10 years ago there was a huge fall out and she hasn't spoken to the other sister and the brother since then.
When their mum was ill she wouldn't go round and help and unfortunately the mum died not long after.
My friend still spoke with this sister for the sake of her mum and even once she died but she is causing so many problems and saying things to other people which of course aren't true. She's now had enough with it. Luckily people have seen her for what she is.
That are all in their 40/50s.

However I sincerely hope it doesn't get that bad for you.

Maggi suggests maybe sending her some flowers and a little note to say "you will always be my sister x"
Worth a try and hopefully she will realize that you care and don't want all this arguing.

I think you've done such a brave thing to get on with it and still see them and at least they and talk to them, I'd Like to hope they take that in and sort themselves out. Everyone says stuff in the heat if the moment

Maybe also approach your dad and just mention that you wish to sort it and see if he suggests anything. At least then he will see you want to sort it.

 

[Dazza1]

My missis just went to pick my bouncy castle up from my dads my sisters were still there and didn't say anythin but she told her kids to say goodbye when she was leavin I don't get it

 

[Caz-133cup]

Its good that she hasn't told the kids to ignore her. Still people are strange.
Have you thought about approaching your dad about it?

 

[Dazza1]

Its good that she hasn't told the kids to ignore her. Still people are strange.
Have you thought about approaching your dad about it?

Well on Sunday I wrote to my sister on FB and said that my missis said Jayden (her son) said he liked my bro inlaws party play bus I said it was up near her for a week and to take the kids up there and I'd tell him to let her on for free. Also invited her to my boys bday party but she never replied but I've left the ball in her court now

 

[Caz-133cup]

Least you've tried and like you say balls in her court now so see what happens. Hope it works out for you

 

[Dazza1]

Cheers caz r let u know what happens

 

[Caz-133cup]

That's alright mate,
Yeah please do

 

[lgonzalez]

I can't really help you out with this, it's not something I have ever experienced myself. But I hope it all works out for you though. It sounds like a heart breaking situation to be in, I can't imagine how it must feel. I cant say I'll be of much help but you have my number if you ever want to call buddy.

 

[rcr484]

I just can't understand why people can do this kind of things to each other.. Must be hard to be in such situation..

 

[funky_d]

Wow, your dad's girlfriend's comment was totally out of order and completely unnecessary, and taken completely out of context by the looks of things! It was definitely the right move of you to ignore it and be the better person there, I dunno if I'd have been able to manage that.

It looks to me like you're the only one out of them all who's being the civilised adult in the situation. Imagine them not talking to you and being so childish like that, especially in front of kids etc.

If it were anyone else I'd just advise to leave them be and get on with your life but seeing as they're family, it's not something you can really do. In all honesty, you sound like you've done your bit by at least making an effort, and if your sisters have a shred of decency left in them, they'll speak to you and try and patch things up with you soon.

Can't choose your family, eh? :roll:

 

[Dazza1]

Cheers Funky

Yeah the saying goes u can't choose your family but u can choose your mates